Bicurious
by Eliza Darling
Summary: AU, OOC. Inspired by South Park episode "Cartman Sucks". Many bicurious boys are forced to join a camp to become straight, but two campers defy the rules. JadenChazz. Rated T for language and yaoi.
1. Intro

**Hey everyone! Just here to say to _really_ get the story, you should watch the South Park episode "Cartman Sucks". It's very funny.**

**I own nothing. And if I did, I'd either kill Asuka or just make her a mega-slut, and Judai and Manjoume would be together. Also, the entire series probably wouldn't be appropriate for the young ones... ._.**

**'Till then,**

**Xoxox,**

**Maggie 3**

Dr. Crowler,

Why does you insist on having us write this stupid letter in the first place? You know why we're here, we know why we're here, and we're both going to write the same thing anyway, so what's the point of writing separate apology letters? In fact, why does this have to be an _apology_ letter? I don't regret anything I did, and neither does my partner. You know what, I might as well take the blame, I mean, _I_ was the one who started it. And after starting, I couldn't bring myself to even _want_ to stop. So why the hell is it my partner's fault, too?

If you feel the need to kick me out, Dr. Crowler, I'd be more than happy to leave this pathetic camp. I personally believe this place teaches absolutely _nothing_ to us "campers", since we're usually hanging around _boys_ all the time anyway. What does _that_ teach us? Geez, no _wonder_ I got in trouble. Maybe it was yours and the reverend's fault for pairing my partner and me together. Who knows?

Sincerely,

Jaden Yuki


	2. Buddies

**Back with an update! If I offend anyone's religion, I swear to God I'm sorry!**

**I own nothing!**

**'Till then,**

**Xoxox,**

**Maggie**

Dr. Crowler,

You wanted to know how it happened, so I'll tell you.

I guess it truly _did_ start the first day I came to camp. You know, it was _your_ fault for putting me in this hellhole. It was _you_ who convinced my parents to spend a crapload of money just to send me to this barren wasteland in the middle of nowhere. If it weren't for you, I'd be snug in my warm bed instead of freezing my ass off on some cold hard brick you decide to call a "bed". Gee, thanks.

But where I knew it started when you introduced me to _him_. Why do you think I was so ecstatic for him to be my accountabilla buddy? Connect the dots, Dr. Crowler.

You see, I already knew what my sexual orientation was way before I came here. I already knew no matter what you did I wouldn't convert myself and I already knew that I was going to get myself kicked out of here somehow—even if it meant my partner was getting kicked out, too.

Thanks to you, I've had a potential boyfriend since day one. I've only behaved myself for this long because of him, you know. I knew I couldn't be without him. But how would you know how I felt? How the days torture you when you don't have someone like _that_ to hold onto? How you feel so neglected when you think he doesn't feel the same about you? How can you sickos possibly try to make us believe that loving someone of the same gender is wrong? I for one am definitely against that.

Also, how could I possibly forget that first day?

You led me through the clear glass door after my dad dropped me off here, doomed to spend the summer in Hell (how ironic), cool air seeping over me from the air conditioning and lightly fluttering my two-toned hair and light jacket. Down the sky blue hall were a bunch of boys about my age surrounding us, you telling them to move. We walked through a while wooden door that looked like every other door in the building, only this one was marked in gold lettering "Reverend Sheppard".

Inside was the reverend stroking his beard, the only hair he had, with a giant grin plastered to his face. You, however, were frowning, as if you hated your job. You know, all that frowning leads to wrinkles. How many face-lifts have you had, Dr. Crowler?

"Reverend, this is our new camper, Jaden Yuki," you said in a fake voice.

"Jaden, welcome!" the reverend greeted. I merely nodded and waved a little. I didn't want to be here at all. In fact, for as long as I live, I will never regret what I did to get myself in trouble here, Dr. Crowler. Just thought you should know.

"Shy I see," the reverend continued. "No matter. You'll learn to love it here—"

Yeah, right.

"… And you'll be able to see the Almighty _really_ has in store for you."

When pigs fly. I have a feeling that God wanted me to be gay.

"In fact, this will all be a relief and a wake up call for you and all our campers."

I honestly hope whoever goes here doesn't believe the crap you're shoving down their throats.

"You'll need an accountabilla buddy," said the reverend. "Crowler, who's open?"

"I believe Chazz's old accountabilla buddy has seen the light," you said.

"Perfect!" the reverend exclaimed. "We'll set you two up. Now, Jaden, remember that you must _never_ lose your accountabilla buddy. That is the number one rule here," he explained.

I nodded. "I got it," I said.

The reverend waved his hand. "Crowler, show Jaden to room 46."

"Yes, sir," you replied in that annoying fake voice.

Once we left, you immediately turned on me. "I want to see no unholy business between you and Chazz," you said. "You are here to learn, not to experiment with your hormones. Going against the Almighty is blasphemy, something you can go to Hell for, you got that, slacker?"

"Yeah, I got it, Mr. Crowler." I smiled.

"I have a PhD!" you barked at me. I blinked, intimidated. "It's _Dr._ Crowler!"

"Okay, I have it, _Dr._ Crowler," I said shakily.

You sneered and turned your nose up, not looking back at me.

After what seemed like forever, we finally made our way to the white wooden door that clearly marked in gold lettering "Room 46".

"Chazz, open up, it's Dr. Crowler," you said.

"Yeah, okay, I'm coming!" said a gruff voice from the other side.

Maybe if I didn't come here, I'd have a chance to "follow the Almighty's will". After that door opened, I knew I didn't have a chance to change.

I'm not afraid to admit it, Dr. Crowler, but Chazz is hotter than every Abercrombie & Fitch model I have ever laid eyes on _combined_. Maybe it was his pale skin, his dark hair, those amazing onyx slits for eyes, or that sexy pout, but whatever it was, he triggered such an emotion in me that I knew for a _fact_ that he had to be mine.

The great thing was, I knew why Chazz was here. I knew that if I could convince him not to listen to a word you said, we'd have a chance to be together.

"Chazz," you said, setting me back into reality, "the reverend _insists_ you have a new accountabilla buddy, so this is Jaden Yuki. Jaden, this is Chazz Princeton."

Ooh, Chazz _Princeton_. How sexy.

"Hi, Chazz!" I greeted cheerfully.

"Hi," Chazz replied, nodding.

"Chazz, why don't you show Jaden around?" you suggested.

"Sure," said Chazz, still sexily pouting. I swear, that pout drives me crazy.

You then left. Not knowing what to do, I stepped into Chazz's, or should I say _our_ room, and placed my bags down.

"Where's your camp shirt?" asked Chazz, sitting down on the bed next to the window. I guessed it was his.

"Huh?" I looked down at my red polo. "Oh!" I remembered. "It's in my bag." I opened my backpack and pulled out the same sky blue t-shirt Chazz was wearing.

I took off my jacket. "Do you mind if I--?"

Chazz shrugged. "Go ahead," he said.

Before I could let Chazz see me blush, I quickly pulled my shirt over my head and took it off.

Maybe it was just me, but I thought I saw him turn slightly pink.

I remember not being able to find my t-shirt after I had halfway stripped. "Chazz, um, where did I…" I trailed off.

Somehow, this all felt so _perfect_. Here I was, topless, in front of the hottest guy I've ever seen, and he was _blushing_, trying to resist not looking at me. Clearly I was getting through to him. It was just a matter of time before our relationship was a little more intimate.

"Um, hello?" I tried again. Chazz wasn't responding.

"You're sitting on it!" he barked suddenly, still not looking.

"Oh. Thanks," I replied, grabbing the shirt from underneath me. I put it on slowly, trying to get Chazz's eyes to wander and linger before I was completely covered.

To my dismay, my dad had ordered a _way_ too-tight t-shirt. I knew my sister Jenny should have chose the size for me. She knows me better than everyone in my life besides her put together.

"Damn it!" I cried, pulling at the collar. "This shirt's too tight!" Wait, were my muscles showing through? Ooh, they _are_. Maybe having a tight shirt wasn't that bad.

Chazz walked over to me and handed me my jacket. "Could you put it on?" he asked.

Hey, whatever makes you happy, Chazz. I smiled. "Okay," I replied, putting it on. "So, when are we touring camp?" I asked.

"Now," Chazz replied, grabbing a tattered black coat from the floor and putting it on.

"Okay." I stood obediently and followed him like a puppy.

We walked down the hall, saying hi to other boys we passed.

"Have any friends here, Chazz?" I asked from behind him.

"Sure." He shrugged.

"Hey Chazz," said a boy about Chazz's age with dark blue hair, brown eyes, glasses, and a country accent.

"Hi." Chazz smirked and waved a little.

"Who's the new guy?" asked Country Boy.

"Jaden Yuki," replied Chazz. Oh my God, if he said my name again, I am going to attack him for saying it so sexily.

Country Boy held his hand out. "Taiyou Torimaki," he said.

I shook it. "Hi!" I exclaimed. "I'm Chazz's new accountabilla buddy."

Torimaki gestured to the boy next to him. "I don't exactly know what his name is," he explained, "but everyone calls him Z. He doesn't talk."

"Hi, Z!" I greeted. Z nodded and waved.

Chazz grabbed my arm. "Okay, now that you're introduced, let's go." He started pulling me.

"Um, see you later!" I called.

We met up with more boys, Zane and Atticus, who were definitely sexy in a manly way, Syrus and Aster, with Syrus being totally adorable and Aster having the most beautiful blue eyes, like, _ever_, and Bastion and Hassleberry, who I could tell would be great friends.

Chazz then led me to the church across from the main building for my first sermon. But I knew it would be more of a lecture to teach me how to live my life. In fact, isn't that the entire meaning of going to church? No wonder I don't go.

I hate to admit it, Dr. Crowler, but when Chazz told me that _you_ were leading the sermon, I cracked up. Sorry, and may the Lord have mercy on my sinning soul.

Sincerely,

Jaden Yuki

**More will be coming your way soon!**

**Xoxox,**

**Maggie 3**


	3. Sermon

**Well, here I am with another chapter! Sadly, I didn't make up the paper clip joke. that is property of South Park.**

**I own nothing!**

**Xoxox,**

**Maggie**

Dr. Crowler,

By now you know how long I've developed this feeling for Chazz, and you know I can be quite cunning and smart when I want to be. Funny how I'm _finally_ coming clean, huh? Getting in trouble certainly has its advantages, doesn't it? Because if Chazz and I hadn't gotten caught, you'd still think I was stupid and oblivious, and Chazz and I probably would have gone further.

You _know_ you can't resist what I'm writing to you, Dr. Crowler; you _know_ you want the juicy details. All in good time, of course, because, like you said before, you wanted to know _exactly_ what happened. We're still on day one.

Naturally, I sat next to Chazz during sermon, at the end of the seventh pew to your right. The order went from left to right: Aster, Syrus, Atticus, Zane, Hassleberry, Bastion, Z, Torimaki, Chazz, and me. Yes, I was that bored and I memorized the order we always sat in at the seventh pew to your right during every sermon. It wasn't a coincidence since we all became friends anyway.

I didn't pay attention during my first sermon. In fact, I never paid attention during _any_ sermon. I just stared at the ground, stood when everyone else stood, and kneeled when everyone else did (I _hated_ the kneeling part—it hurt like a bitch!).

During my first sermon, did you actually hold up a paper clip and say, "You are a paper clip. And like a paper clip, God needs to bend you and make you straight"? You know, Chazz had to smack me upside the head just to keep me from cracking up at that. Thanks a lot.

There was only one good thing about sermon, and that was the hymns. Chazz and I always shared a book since day one; our heads slightly pressed together, eyes scanning the page, my eyes searching other places.

I was an okay singer, not too shabby, but _Chazz_ was a rock star! He had something pure but gruff in his voice, and it produced a beautiful sound. I could never concentrate.

Of course, the reverend pulled me back into reality that first day by telling us about the girls.

"As you know," he announced, "tonight is the annual Boys and Girls Dance, held right here in this church. Don't worry; we staff will move everything so you don't have to. The girls, as you know, are just as confused as you are. Hopefully you will all see the light tonight at eight. That is all; you are dismissed for lunch."

This was a chance for Chazz to be straight. I couldn't let it happen. Aren't I just devious, Dr. Crowler?

Sincerely,

Jaden Yuki

**Stay tuned; more to come soon!**

**Xoxox,**

**Maggie 3**


	4. Lunch

**Yayz to new chapters! More will come soon!**

Dr. Crowler,

This is all I heard after sermon: "Will Alexis be there?"

Who _was_ Alexis? (I mean, I know _now_, but I didn't back then) And what's so important about her? What, was she some totally hot supermodel or something?

Of course, during lunch, all the guys were talking about the dance, too. Our group sat at a round table, me stuck between Chazz and Aster. What a dream come true.

This was basically how out conversation went:

**Syrus:** I hope Mindy will be there.

**Atticus: ** Mindy? Jasmine's who I wanna see. She's so cute, she ranks right under every Abercrombie model on my list.

**Zane: **Everyone knows the Calvin Kline ones are better.

**Aster:** Hollister.

**Z:** …

**Torimaki:** Jake Gyllenhaal. He _defines_ sexy country boy. That is, until he got that ferret of a mustache in _Brokeback Mountain_.

**Hassleberry:** True.

**Bastion:** I'm personally for David Beckham.

**Chazz:** You just like him 'cause he's British.

**Bastion:** Touché. What say you, Princeton?

**Chazz:** Duh. Pete Wentz.

**Bastion: **And _you_ just like him because he's emo!

**Chazz: **So?

**You: **No unholy business!

**All: **Yes, Dr. Crowler.

Like we stopped talking about guys there.

**Syrus: **Hey, Jaden, what do you think?

**Me: **… I don't know. Rob Pattinson?

**All: **No!

**Atticus: **You can't possibly like that pretty boy.

**Chazz: **Is your brain like, a peanut or something?

**Zane: **…

**Torimaki: **C'mon, Jaden, at least have a _type_.

**Me: **A _type_?

**Aster: **Yeah, a type. Like… I like California guys.

**Torimaki: **Country boy.

**Z: **…

**Chazz: **Emo-slash-punk.

**Hassleberry: **Army.

**Bastion:** Intellectual.

**Atticus: **Surfer.

**Syrus: **Kawaii.

**Zane: **Clean cut.

**Me: **Uh…

**All: **_YOU DON'T HAVE A TYPE_?

**Me:** Hot?

**Chazz: **You're hopeless!

**Atticus and Aster: **C'mon, dude!

**Syrus: **Jay, everyone has a type.

**Me: **They do?

**Bastion: **Of course!

**Hassleberry: **C'mon soldier! I'm sure even _Z_ has a type!

**Me: **He does?

**Chazz: **Yeah, I bet he goes for the quiet ones.

**All: ** (laugh)

**Atticus: **Okay, let's start with the basics, Jaden. Do you like anyone here?

**Me: **Yeah.

**Aster: **Have you ever liked a girl?

**Me: **No.

**Syrus: **Are you _ever_ going to like a girl?

**Me: **No. I don't like girls. Not now, not ever.

**Bastion: **So for _sure_ you're—

**Me: **Yeah.

**Torimaki: **He's doomed. He's stuck here for eternity.

**Zane: **Be realistic, Torimaki.

**Syrus: **Crowler's gonna brainwash Jaden!

**Zane: **…

**Me: **… Be realistic, Sy.

We ate in silence for the rest of lunch.

Dr. Crowler, you probably learned a lot about the guys by reading this.

Sincerely,

Jaden Yuki

**Byes for now!**


	5. Dance

**Okay, FINALLY Ch. 5!!! Sorry I haven't updated in so long, but I had TONS of homework to finish up. Just a warning: Alexis is VERY OOC, but that's what I wanted to happen.**

**xoxox,**

**Maggie**

Dr. Crowler,

Thanks to yours and Sheppard's "brilliant" idea, Chazz was up in a tizzy about the dance.

He rummaged through "our" sliding closet, trying to find what to wear. I, however, was already ready, wearing a white t-shirt, red flannel, black skinny jeans, and black Converse. That was about the most formal thing I had on me, I think.

Chazz held up an Armani tux. "What the hell are you thinking?" I demanded. "Too formal!" I bet he would look sexy in it, though.

"Fine, if you're so good at picking out clothes, then _you_ do it!" said Chazz.

Within seconds, I extracted black skinny jeans with a chain, a muscle black t-shirt, and white and black checkered Vans slip-ons. "There, I said, throwing them on his bed.

I'll fast forward to the dance, Dr. Crowler. You, Sheppard, and the girls' counselor, Ms. Fontaine chaperoned, and Z you hired as the DJ. He may not have talked, but he laid down some great beats.

Alexis was the easiest to pick out from the group of girls. She was tall, blonde, and supermodel-like, making her the one who could turn any guy straight. Basically every guy had his eye on her except for me. But that was exactly who Alexis had _her_ eye on, me.

As Atticus snuck scotch into the punch bowl, Alexis walked up to me. "What's up, cutie?" she asked.

"Uh…" I grabbed the nearest boy, Zane, and dragged him over to her. "Dance with Zane; I'm thirsty."

"Okay," agreed Alexis, shrugging, and she led Zane to the dance floor, grinding up to him with her large implants (it seemed, those couldn't have _possibly_ been _real_), barely covered by her midriff sky blue tube top, and her barely-covering-down-there jean miniskirt, all to the beat of "He's All That" by Cascada.

Grabbing a plastic cup, I looked over at Chazz, who had all eyes on Alexis. Crap. I grabbed another cup and filled it with the vile liquid.

Wow, this punch was strong. I think Atticus poured the entire bottle of scotch in the bowl, maybe even more.

I walked up to Chazz, handing him the fuller cup. "Drink up!" We tapped glasses and drank. Chazz winced. "Is this spiked?" he asked. I shrugged. Chazz, too, shrugged and downed the rest. "I gotta talk to Alexis," he said. He did _not_ just say that.

"Um, you don't wanna do that," I put in.

"Why not?" he demanded. "She's hot."

"Seriously," I argued. "She's not interested." I was only making stuff up now.

"Jaden, move! If I wanna talk to Alexis, I'll do it!" He pushed me out of the way and stalked up to her. "Hi," he greeted, "I'm Chazz."

Alexis gasped and slapped him. What the hell?

"I'm dancing with Zane," she said. "Go away." Maybe Alexis wasn't _that_ bad.

Chazz walked back over to where I was standing. "She wants me," he said.

"Keep telling yourself that, Chazz," I replied, patting his shoulder.

It was nice to stand there, just the two of us, not doing anything.

Then all of a sudden: "Paaarrrtaaaayy!!"

Oh God. Was Atticus drunk _already_?

Somehow, Atticus had locked you outside of the building, so you couldn't scold him for his shenanigans. Wasn't that just the coolest? How does he _do_ things like that and get away with it, anyway?

More scotch was poured into the punch bowl. Boy, were we going to be hung-over the next day.

"C'mon, Chazz! Let's go get some more punch!" I said.

"Whatever," he replied, following me.

It was 10:30. I'm somewhat drunk, and I can't find Chazz. Just great. Give me a medal for my eagle eyes.

Alexis was still gyrating against Zane (who stood there like a log, by the way. How boring), trying to get him to want her. Atticus pulled a red-haired girl named Jasmine onto the dance floor. Mindy, a raven-haired girl, twirled with Syrus (it was pretty cute too, I mean, she _was_ taller than him). All the other guys were dancing with some of the girls. You were still outside the building, and Sheppard and Ms. Fontaine were nowhere to be found. Ew, Doesn't that thought make you shudder? I mean, where _were_ they?

Anyway, I found Chazz in the corner of the room, sitting with his head in between his knees.

"Chazz?" I asked.

"Sheeyat, I'm so fucking drunk," he slurred back.

I helped him up as "Disturbia" by Rihanna started. "Wanna dance?" I suggested.

He shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

I love this guy.

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

"You're too boring!" cried Alexis to Zane. He shrugged and walked away.

She walked up to Chazz and me. "C'mon, cutie, dance with me!" she said.

_What's wrong with me?_

_Why do I feel like this?_

_I'm going crazy now_

_No more gas in the rig_

_Can't even get it started_

_Nothing heard, nothing said_

_Can't even speak about it_

_All my life on my head_

_Don't want to think about it_

_Feels like I'm going insane_

_Yeah_

_It's a thief in the night_

_To come and grab you_

_It can creep up inside you_

_And consume you_

_A disease of the mind_

_It can control you_

_It's too close for comfort_

"I'll dance with you!" said Chazz.

Alexis sneered and slapped him. Ugh! "No!" she replied. "I want your friend!"

"Uh…" I grabbed Aster, the nearest boy to me. "Dance with Aster," I said.

"Okay!" She shrugged and gyrated against Aster, who played along.

"Dude, thanks!" he cried over the music.

_Throw on your brake lights_

_We're in the city of wonder_

_Ain't gonna play nice_

_Watch out, you might just go under_

_Better think twice_

_Your train of thought will be altered_

_So if you must falter be wise_

_Your mind's in Disturbia_

_It's like the darkness is the light_

_Disturbia_

_Am I scaring you tonight?_

_Disturbia_

_Ain't used to what you like_

_Disturbia_

_Disturbia_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Faded pictures on the wall_

_It's like they talking' to me_

_Disconnecting' your call_

_Your phone don't even ring_

_I gotta get out_

_Or figure this shit out_

_It's too close for comfort_

Ignoring Aster, I grabbed Chazz and danced with him. Well, "danced" if you count me dancing like an idiot and Chazz just standing there.

_It's a thief in the night_

_To come and grab you_

_It can creep up inside you_

_And consume you_

_A disease of the mind_

_It can control you_

_I feel like a monster_

_Throw on your brake lights_

_We're in the city of wonder_

_Ain't gonna play nice_

_Watch out, you might just go under_

_Better think twice_

_Your train of thought will be altered_

_So if you must falter be wise_

_Your mind's in Disturbia_

_It's like the darkness is the light_

_Disturbia_

_Am I scaring you tonight?_

_Disturbia_

_Ain't used to what you like_

_Disturbia_

_Disturbia_

"Loosen up, Chazz!" I cried, swinging my arms over my head.

"Like I know how to dance!" he retorted.

I placed my hands on his hips, loving the warm contact. Chazz froze, flushing. I pulled him in closer. "Like this," I whispered by his ear, moving his hips in perfect rhythm with mine.

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Release me from this curse I'm in_

_Trying to maintain_

_But I'm struggling_

_You can't go, go, go_

_I think I'm going to oh, oh, oh_

Beginning to feel the beat, Chazz took my hands off of his hips, but he never let go of them.

_Throw on your brake lights_

_We're in the city of wonder_

_Ain't gonna play nice_

_Watch out, you might just go under_

_Better think twice_

_Your train of thought will be altered_

_So if you must falter be wise_

_Your mind is in Disturbia_

_It's like the darkness is the light_

_Disturbia_

_Am I scaring you tonight?_

_Disturbia_

_Ain't used to what you like_

_Disturbia_

_Disturbia_

As the song ended, I found my face an inch away from Chazz's. His face was sweaty, his bangs stuck to his forehead, his eyes were glazed over, and his chest was panting.

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

_Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum_

My cheeks grew hot. I needed to have him _now_. I grabbed the back of his neck. "Kiss me," I whispered.

Holy crap, he was leaning in! Score!

_Woosh_. _Thump_!

He missed me by a millimeter, and fell face down to the floor. Shoot, I was _that_ close.

I moved, or rather, _dragged_ Chazz back to our room and laid him down on his bed. I must admit, even in this state, he was still hot.

Now, to strip or not to strip? That is the question. Should I just leave Chazz there? Or should I give him something more comfortable to wear?

Whatever. I decided to let it go and get back to the party.

It had gotten wilder. Atticus, Aster, Zane, and Torimaki watched Alexis and Jasmine make out, and some of the guys and girls joined their own gender to dance it out on the dance floor. The only straight couple seemed to be Mindy and Syrus, who giggled and danced like they were in love. How cute.

For the rest of the night, I stood by the wall of the room like a sober idiot who didn't know left from right. But as stupid as I seemed, Alexis didn't stop talking to me.

12:02 A.M.

**Alexis:** C'mon, cutie, I wanna dance with you!

**Me:** Not now. I'm tired.

**Alexis:** Please? Just one dance! I'll make out with you!

**Me:** Rain-check on that.

Ew. I wouldn't make out with Alexis if we were the last two living people on this planet.

**Alexis:** I want some punch.

12:46 A.M.

**Alexis:** I just made out with Jasmine.

**Me:** Good for you.

**Alexis:** Don't you think that's sexy?

**Me:** _No_, I'm—

**Alexis:** Oh, _right_, you're bi. Me, too!

**Me:** How _else_ would you be here?

**Alexis:** Good point. Oh, well. Wanna dance?

**Me:** Not now. I'm still tired.

**Alexis:** Let me get you some punch then, cutie.

**Me:** Nah, not feeling it.

**Alexis:** … I want some punch.

1:18 A.M.

**Alexis:** Ooh, I love this song! "Pain" by Three Days Grace, right?

**Me:** No, this is "Check Yes Juliet" by We The Kings.

**Alexis:** Oh. Wanna dance?

**Me:** No. Still not feeling it.

**Alexis:** Wow, you sure have a lot of willpower.

**Me:** Not exactly. Why don't you get some more punch?

**Alexis:** Okay!

1:43 A.M.

**Alexis:** Today I like you, Zane, Aster, and Jasmine.

**Me:** That's nice.

**Alexis:** Do you like me?

**Me:** No.

**Alexis:** Oh, so you love me!

**Me:** _No_.

**Alexis:** Aw, you're struggling with your feelings for me! You're so cute!

**Me:** Sure, I guess I'm cute.

**Alexis:** Want some punch?

**Me:** No.

**Alexis:** Well, _I_ want some.

2:17 A.M.

**Alexis:** Great party, huh?

**Me:** Sure.

**Alexis:** Where's your friend?

**Me:** Passed out.

**Alexis:** He _so_ wanted me. Tell him I'd dance with him now, okay?

**Me:** Sure, I'll pass on the message.

**Alexis:** I'm gonna go get some more punch.

2:52 A.M.

**Alexis:** I like you.

**Me:** I _know_.

**Alexis:** Will you kiss me if I ask you to?

**Me:** _Please_. Of course not.

**Alexis:** Hee, hee, you're so cute!

**Me:** Do you even know my name?

**Alexis:** Do you know mine?

**Me:** You're Alexis Rhodes. You're Atticus's sister.

**Alexis:** You're so smart!

**Me:** What's my name?

**Alexis:** … I'm in the sudden need of more punch.

3:24 A.M.

**Alexis:** You're Jaden Yuki!

**Me:** You _just_ figured that out?

**Alexis:** … No. I knew this entire time.

**Me:** Sure. I'll pretend to believe you.

**Alexis:** I was playing hard-to-get!

**Me:** How is that supposed to work?

**Alexis:** I don't know. Maybe more punch?

**Me:** Knock yourself out.

4:07 A.M.

**Alexis:** Hi, Jaden—_Bleach_!

**Me:** Can someone clean up the drunken whore on aisle two? And can someone bring me some clean pants?

**Alexis:** Hee, you're _funny_. I want more punch.

That Alexis ruined my pants! Don't laugh, Dr. Crowler. I mean, if you got puke on _your_ pants, you'd be pretty pissed off, wouldn't you?

Give yourself a note: Watch Atticus closely at these "shin-digs" so he doesn't spike the punch. Trust me, it'll save you from a killer hangover headache.

Sincerely,

Jaden Yuki

**Okay, I'll update ASAP! As soon as I finish my homework!!! ^^ Just to sum up, thanks for all the awesome reviews! You really keep me going! Luv u all!!!**


End file.
